So your worst nightmare became a reality. Your 21 year old son drops a bombshell and comes out to you and declares that he is gay. Your immediate reaction is a cold embrace of the situation, you are numb and shocked but your integrity as a mother drives you to hug him and whisper in his ear that it is okay. Your mind however, is running on full speed trying to figure out what next?
Try not to make assumptions and let them come and tell you in their own time. One thing you can do is give them the information they need to make good decisions. You can contact Stonewall's Information Service for pointers. One of the hardest things for LGBT people to face is rejection from their friends and family. New laws have made our country fairer and more equal.
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Whilst this information is, for obvious reasons, aimed primarily at parents, it is equally valid for consideration by families, friends and associated persons of lesbians and gays. Beginning to understand? Many books have been written, much has been said and many theories have been advanced about homosexuality, but from all this, one fact emerges: no one has conclusively proved what it is that causes homosexuality. Unhappily, and wrongly, the second fact is that homosexuals are discriminated against. The weight of evidence increasingly suggests that it is genetic.
This moment of honesty is the beginning of a journey that can be challenging for both you and your child. But with a little awareness, openness, some practical tools and support you can both grow through this experience, creating an even closer and more supportive family connection. Let's face it, the coming out process for LGBT adolescents can be a terrifying moment, not only for the teenager, but also their family and friends. It is a time of high emotions that can run the gamut from confusion, shock, disbelief, rejection and anger, to acceptance, peace, understanding and concern.